I love you (fifty shades plus)

***The following is a translation of I love you statements that mean different things at different times***

I love you=you’re so amazing! Where have you been all my life?!

I love you=I can’t believe you chose me

I love you=I want this forever

I love you=I hope you love me as much also

I love you=I’m so happy we met/we’re together

I love you=you’re so annoying

I love you=you drive me crazy

I love you=you’re lucky I love you

I love you=that’s why I put up with you

I love you=look at how you’re treating me

I love you=why don’t you understand that?

I love you=that’s why it hurts

I love you=I’ll never hurt you

I love you=I hope you’ll never hurt me

I love you=it hurts me to know you’re hurting

I love you=what I’m about to say is going to hurt

I love you=I don’t want to disappoint you

I love you=I want to be all that I can be for you

I love you=you make me strive for better

I love you=I want to give you the whole world

I love you=I want to marry you

I love you=please marry me

I love you=that’s why I married you

I love you=you so crazy

I love you=you so dumb

I love you=you so goofy

I love you=you wiiiiiiiiild

I love you=trust me

I love you=I trust you

I love you=it’s okay/don’t worry

I love you=everything is okay now

I love you=I feel safe with you

I love you=I’m afraid of losing you

I love you=I don’t want to lose you

I love you=please don’t leave… stay

I love you=please don’t push me away

I love you=open up to me

I love you=I’m wide open to you

I love you=I’ll go HAM on anyone and fight over you

I love you=no one else is above you

I love you=you are my one and only

I love you=I’ll play the fool for you

I love you=I’ll do anything for you

I love you=I screwed up

I love you=I’m sorry

I love you=please don’t be mad at me

I love you=I hope you forgive me

I love you=do you forgive me?

I love you=I forgive you

I love you=I can’t stay mad at you

I love you=come over here and give me some love

I love you=we aren’t perfect people, we’re trying people

I love you=let’s try again

I love you=let’s start over fresh

I love you=you’re worth all the trouble

I love you=I haven’t given up on you

I love you=please don’t give up on me

I love you=you still have my heart, trust, and loyalty

I love you=I hope I still have your heart, trust, and loyalty

I love you=I miss you

I love you=I’ve been thinking about you

I love you=I want to connect with you again/some more

I love you=close isn’t close enough

I love you=you’re everything I desire

I love you=I appreciate you

I love you=thank you

I love you=I know you don’t want to hear this right now, but I love you

I love you=can we have sex

I love you=let’s have sex

I love you=it’s about to go down

I love you=wow! That was so amazing

I love you=no one understands me like you do

I love you=no one knows me the way you know me

I love you=you’re my best friend

I love you=I’m so lucky to have your love

I love you=you’re the best thing that ever happened to me

I love you=you’re not perfect, but you’re perfect for and to me

I love you=love is all I have to give you

I love you=I love you

I thought I was

I thought I was good until I was around good people…

Then I thought I was bad until was around bad people…

Then I thought I was positive until I was around positive people…

Then I thought I was negative until I was around negative people…

Then I thought I was strong until I was around strong people…

Then I thought I was weak until I was around weak people…

Then I thought I was rich until I was around rich people…

Then I thought I was poor until I was around poor people…

Then I thought I was smart until I was around smart people…

Then I thought I was dumb until I was around dumb people…

Then I thought I was enlightened until I was around enlightened people…

Then I thought I was ignorant until I was around ignorant people…

Then I thought I was beautiful until I was around beautiful people…

Then I thought I was ugly until I was around ugly people…

Then I thought I was a saint until I was around saints…

Then I thought I was a sinner until I was around sinners…

Then I thought I was right until I was around the right people…

Then I thought I was wrong until I was around the wrong people…
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So what have I learned?
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1) It’s clear that I thought a lot of things.

2) My thoughts have attracted others who thought the same.

3) I’m clearly not who I think myself to be.

4) But I am who I attract… or at least I was lol

5) My thoughts have changed, but I have stayed the same.

6) My environments have changed my thoughts, but I have changed my environments.

7) I have an experience, but I don’t have an identity.

8) I have experienced what I have identified.

9) I have found others to share the same experience.

10) I have found differences in the experiences we share.

Desire: wanting what’s wanted

Many of us are told and often encouraged to pursue our desires. To “get what you want” out of life. Not many of us are told to question our desires and trace them back, rather than to follow them, to the source.

If we list our desires: fame, big house, fashionable attire, body type, relationships, job, area of expertise, music, food, etc (whatever is materialistic or objectified). Then draw a line backwards from the item in pursuit, we find that there are levels of prestige, superiority, admiration and desirability, fear, respect, love, hate, acknowledgement and attention, envy, and flattering associated with these things. However, you if you take one more step back you’ll find that all of the desires of yours stem from other people. You want people to respond or see you in a certain way as you have spent countless hours trying to make yourself desirable to others, or acknowledged by others. If an action or an object gains attention, why wouldn’t you buy an exotic car and crack jokes that may be crude? Better yet, why would you? Funny thing is that you could hardly flee desires as long as people surround you. It’s almost inescapable because to live in this world you’ve been conditioned to withhold what’s undesirable about you to show what is desirable about you and continue to pursue what is desirable to OTHERS. Note that some of the things you want are what people want you to want.

But what if there is a way to flee desires? How would you do so and what would that look and feel like? Schopenhaur says, “A man can be himself only so long as he is alone; and if he does not love solitude, he himself will not love freedom; for it is only when he is alone that he is free.” So solitude is one way to escape desire (and another way to run some off the edge). So imagine this world we live in right now, but you’re the last person on earth. Everything that you materialistically wanted is available and at your disposal, but there are no people around. Aside from the emotional experience of loneliness, do you think you will still want all that you desire right now? You’d probably try them out for some time, but then succeed to what is practical. Example: you get all the Ralph Lauren you want and you wear them until you’ve tried every outfit combination out. Eventually you might conclude that–since you’re the last person on earth–that it’s easier to just roam around naked. It’s practicality at its purest form.

So imagine that. Would you still want what you want if no one else is around? Theoretically, you’ve inherited the whole world. So what else would you want and for what?

Ellipsis

Let us be until we become whatever it is that may be,
For as long as we may be, just as long as we may be,
For all we know this may be all that we will ever be,
Because for now we have certainty but tomorrow has our “maybes”,
Meet me where I am, let’s get acquainted with where we stand,
I’ve learned that introductions are recurring daily events,
“Hello, I am here! And you are? Right here with me,”
The present bridges the gap to make our two ends meet,
And I’m pleased to meet you and even happier that we’ve met,
Although time has passed it’s like neither of us have left,
At times I get ahead of myself, but I’m focused on where the dots connect,
Not what dot is next…

Scott Free

Jesus, show me scars or show me forgiveness,
Momma, show me scars or show me forgiveness,
Baby, show me scars or show me forgiveness,
Y’all just show me scars or show me forgiveness,

And I’ll show you I’ve tried to quarantine any cause for casualties,
Injuries, and pathogens from passer-bys who’ve passed it on to me,
Raw energy is just as contagious as a nasty sneeze,
To who’s own aura bears no full immunity,
Cause and effect, don’t act on the behalf of me,
It’s a cause for regret, there’s no such thing as a perfect me,
Show me flesh wounds then show me how well you remember,
I’ll Show you that time heals but you show that history last forever,
The afflicted conflicted with the pain that’s inflicted,
Even when acquitted I’ll try to justify why I’m convicted,
The scars depicted is probably the scars I bore evicted,
Naw I changed my mind, it’s my heart when it’s contradicted,
Just admit it we’re hypocritical critics,
Habitual addicts to a traditional adage,
“Hurt people hurt people” but what about forgiveness?
A concept seldom practiced cause it sounds inconsistent.

Don’t let education fool you!

Just because you’re “educated” it does not mean that you’re a “good” person. I hate to spoil it for you, but I wouldn’t say it if it weren’t true.

People–“educated” people, might I add–believe too often that ignorance equates to evil and condescend to those less “educated” as criminals. By no means am I saying that crimes aren’t committed by ignorant people, but I AM saying crimes are committed by “educated” people as well; these proclaimed and self-proclaimed “good” people. In fact, the crimes most often committed by these people are crimes against humanity.

Hitler wasn’t uneducated, was he? Look at the lives that have been lost… who’s “good” now? Aren’t evil villains who plan for world domination intelligent? Lex Luther? The “Brain” in “Pinky and the Brain?” All of Batman’s enemies? White settlers believed they were intellectually superior compared to other races and look at the oppression that has come of it. Men thought that they were smarter than women and look at the tutelage that has come of it. Albert Einstein, who is praised for his genius intellectual dexterity, created the atomic bomb. A bomb that does not cure nor resurrect, but only sentences death. A bomb that even he himself regrets creating, and is now prevalent nuclear threat to our exist, as we now call them “weapons of mass destruction.”

By no means am I calling Albert Einstein evil at all because his knowledge contributed a lot. However, you could see, even in your own lives, those of you who call yourselves “educated” commit crimes of evil; crimes against humanity. How many of you took advantage of another person, duping them, because you believed they were “dumb?” We’ve all done so, still we’ll castigate one for their “ignorance” while disregarding that we were once ignorant ourselves. Someone must have taught you what you know now, right? Isn’t it a bit redundant for “smart” people to go to school? (Think about it)

This is a war against minds, from which the weapons of mass destruction have been created. This is a war against minds, not people, but why? I mean, it makes sense that our brains are our survival advantage. When compared to other animals who may camouflage or use their keen sense of smell to survive, we use our brains! It is for this reason I am an advocate for education and life learning. However, people have done the illest things to one another and everything around them in order to survive. People mentally and verbally kill others before even having the physical chance to do so. These people may have used a tool to do it, but most of all they’ve used their brains.

So don’t believe hype yall… just because you’re “educated” it does not make you a “good” person. Maybe that worked in elementary school when the teacher praised you for getting good grades and doing something correctly, but that praise is not because you’re a good person. It’s because you could survive in a given environment. You’ve mastered the ability to comply and follow directions (what I personally like to call “the monkey dance… it’s easy and anyone could do it).

However, for those of you who have taken hold of your own mind and your every being I encourage you to help others get to that place too. Eliminating ignorance through enlightenment rather than physical extermination (or exploitation). Knowledge is power and with more power comes more responsibility. So let’s use the power to express to each other our full awareness and interconnectedness of humanity, and not our elitist grandiosity.

Anti Culture

One is neither good nor bad, but capable of both. We see “good guys” doing “bad things” in some of the films we enjoy and call them our heroes even after we sometimes find out the “bad guys” are doing something “good” for someone or someones they see fit for their behavior (not exactly sure who). Still this dichotomous divide is how people identify themselves and others even when behaviors may contradict.

I, for one, believe there are both socially acceptable and unacceptable behavior instead of good and bad people. As a psychosocial rehabilitation worker, I work to promote and develop pro-social behaviors with my clients which are, more often than not, socially acceptable behavior. This of course allows them the chance to engage with the larger population appropriately and find acceptance like we all look for. However, too often, my clients are taught or have been told that they are bad, and are made to feel that they are incompetent or unable to do anything correctly. With most of my experience working with children in an outpatient program and adolescent youths in a juvenile detention facility, I find that these people are socially isolated from groups and group activities. This of course leads them to find acceptance elsewhere doing other things with others who aren’t accepted as well. This, in most cases, results in an array of deviant practices and outcomes sadly.

“Well tell them how ‘bad’ they’re being and to stop being ‘bad’.” Well how about I tell you to stop being “good” and start being a human being? With being unable to find acceptance with the population at large, do you really believe castigating someone some more is going to make them choose to fight for your approval? “Good people” repel these people from the chance of experiencing pro-social consequences from socially acceptable behavior. In fact, “good people” kill “bad people” and are still accepted by their population at large. A “good person’s” interaction with “bad people” is nothing less than condescending, self righteous and in someways dehumanizing. When will a “good person” ever cross the divide and treat the “bad person” like a human? Well only when they get rid of the two labels and recognizes the humanity in themselves as well as in the other. A “good person” can’t do that, only a human can.

As I work with my client’s and hear their guardian describe their child as a good candidate for death row, I figured that they already hear that message enough at home, school, and the community. They don’t need one more person telling them that. They need a practicing human to reassure them that they are STILL human.

The Conceptual Man

When you conceptualize a man you trap him,//
The biggest lie you ever told yourself was that you’re “a good person,”//
Likewise you’ve never fully been “the bad guy,”//
Instead of a contextual eye you confabulated, exaggerated and aggrandized,//
To fit in a larger set of guise paying no mind to what you tried to hide,//
A fox in sheepskin is your ideal disguise,//
because it wasn’t your snout but it was the wool that helped you survive,//
Little did you know that you’re not hunting sheep… should that be a surprise?//
Call a man a name other than his own,//
And revoke him of his privileges to create an alternative to what’s shown,//
Protect your image, but even that isn’t really yours,//
Even your name was given along with the life you’ve never asked for,//
Created: this you are. To create is your ability,//
And much of what you’ve created so far have been created under a created concept of reality.//

Why do white people feel inferior?

3/5 of man does not represent me, it represents you.

Appreciation is absent in lack

Ask any rich man or woman how much money is enough money… did you ask yourself??? Are you surprised I called you rich? Yes, you’re rich! Now how much did you say you wanted, or lacked, or said you’re deficient of?? …And this will be enough?

“The Lord is my Shepherd, I shall not want.” Psalms 23:1

Want (noun and or verb): 1. a desire for something or to desire something. 2. a lack of something or to lack something.

“The Lord is my Shepherd, I shall not [Lack].” Psalms 23:1

I’ve found recently that there’s no appreciation in lack. For as long as there’s a want, appreciation will be missing. Rather, a deficiency will be spotted in one’s life and magnified in place of appreciation. Everything that you identified that you want is almost always related to your happiness, if not always. However, the fact that you want/lack these things inversely implies that you’re not happy. Also, depending on how much you want dictates how long it’ll take for you to be happy.

BEING unhappy=WANTING to be happy.

People always want and want even more! And most, if not all, strive for what they want (myself included). Even after recieving what was wanted, something else is thereafter identified as wanted/lacking which leaves NO time to appreciate what WAS wanted. So when someone “wants to be happy” do they really know what they are lacking? When a rich person “wants to be rich” do they really know what they are lacking?  (Did you get that? Read those two questions over again if you didn’t). HAPPY PEOPLE DON’T WANT TO BE HAPPY! In fact, happy people don’t want anything at all! HAPPY PEOPLE HAVE EVERYTHING! Therefore happy people don’t strive the same way unhappy people do. This difference is in the matter of wanting/lacking and having. How can you lack what you have? How can you appreciate what you want? Neither of these things can happen at the same time because they oppose each other. So what happens when you switch your mind from “I want/lack everything” to “I have everything?” Appreciation is what happens because that is what happy people do; they appreciate.

“The Lord is my Shepherd, I shall not want.” Psalms 23:1 (read the rest of that Psalm).

So the next time you pray or make a list for what you want, consider praying or making a list about what you have. Maybe that happiness might appear somewhere. You’ve been rich and had enough money this whole time.